When I didn't go to Costco...

I had a long list of things I needed for the house.

Costco was on that list.

And I kept not going.

It was snowing. Or it was peak busy hours. Or I was tired. Or it was just… not today.

So one evening, I decided: Today is the day.

I’d come home from work, change quickly, and head out. I had about an hour before it got unbearably crowded. A perfect window.

I got home, ate something and stood in my room about to change.

And then I paused. I actually noticed what I was doing.

And I said out loud: “Nope. I’m not going to Costco.”

Instead, I changed into comfy sweats.

And that’s when I knew.

Something had changed.

---

Let me rewind a few months.

I’d had a great summer. My business was doing well. Everything looked like it was working.

And yet, there was this low-grade unease underneath it all.

It started quietly.

“I can’t be bothered to do this.” 

“I can’t be bothered to teach a class.”

Then I noticed I needed more rest than usual. I wanted to sit at home with a book. 

I didn’t want to optimize anything.

I just needed a break.

From nothing in particular.

I’ve done enough self-work to know this moment.

When things stop feeling fun, that’s not failure, that’s a cue.

So I chose.

I chose to take a three‑month pause from my business.

I still saw a handful of clients. But I didn’t schedule classes. I didn’t launch. I didn’t push. I said no to lots of invites.

I stopped.

And I lived my life.

I did things that were fun for me.

---

That pause showed me something I hadn’t wanted to see.

The number of places I was functioning from push. From force. From shoulds and musts.

How dysregulated my nervous system actually was—despite how much I knew about regulation.

So I slowed down even more.

I meditated more. Read more. Breathed more. Got my bars run more. Got more hands on body work done.

I went to events I would’ve never gone to before.

And I didn’t realize how deeply I needed all of it.

---

Before this turns into a 30‑minute read, here’s what that pause taught me:

• I require far more relaxation than I was allowing myself

• I truly desire to create my life from ease, space, peace and rest

• Hustle and “ra‑ra” energy is not for me

• There is a deeper level of trust available to me with my body

• If a choice feels even slightly like a push, that’s my cue to pause

• I don’t need to convince anyone that my work is priceless—everyone gets to choose

• Simple parasympathetic practices bring me immense joy (legs up against the wall is still a favourite)

• I am genuinely willing to let life come to me—with ease, joy, and glory

No chasing required.

---

This pause changed everything.

I’m offering classes again.

But from a very different space.

I’m not trying to fill my calendar.

Doing more no longer equals more success.

So when I tried to force myself to go to Costco that night, my body responded immediately.

Tight. Stressed. Contracted.

Clear.

This choice wasn’t going to expand my world.

So I placed an online order instead.

And I rested.

And it was wonderful.

My body was grateful.

---

I’m sharing this with you so you can take a look at your own life.

Where are you pushing? Where are you hustling?

And where might slowing down actually create more?

There’s no right or wrong way.

There’s only the way that works best for you.

Until next time....